20231228 Deep Space Lord's Weekly Journal Chapter.62

Hey everyone! It's time for our weekly journal again!

This will be the final journal entry of the year!

Amin returned to streaming this week and tried out vertical streams for the very first time. While I messed up the settings for my first *The Exit 8* stream, I got it right the second time around and definitely noticed the positive impact! I hope it brought in some new viewers.

I had a blast listening in on today's agency collab! My Japanese still needs a lot of work (Shigure-sensei is crying), so I spent most of the time just listening and keeping a tab open to Google what different phrases meant. I've always heard that the easiest way to learn Japanese is through full immersion, but I hadn't really tried it before. After today's stream, even with my limited Japanese, I was able to piece things together and understand quite a bit. That's a massive leap from where I used to be—back then, I couldn't even recognize the sounds, let alone type Japanese text into Google! So, I'm giving myself a huge pat on the back. That said, I've definitely neglected my studies for too long. In the new year, I really need to kick this procrastination habit and get back into learning >_<

During the collab today, someone asked what our most memorable moment of the year was. My answer was the welcome stream for Muqing, because I was the host. I got so much positive feedback both during and after the event. Everyone involved had a great time, so I was thrilled with how it turned out. Even though I looked back later and found areas where I needed to improve, hosting requires you to juggle so many moving parts. If it were completely up to me, I'd prefer to take a backseat on hosting duties. But if there's an opportunity to grow, I don't want to let fear hold me back. Huge respect to all my fellow members who regularly take on the hosting role!

To be honest, aside from that specific stream, a few other things really stood out to me this year: the offline event (I'm so incredibly thankful to all the Little Cottons who showed up to support me T_T), my 2nd anniversary (I bawled my eyes out—thank you so much to the Little Cottons who wrote songs and messages for me, and to everyone who has stuck by my side T_T), the Taiwanese VTuber Triathlon (I can't believe I actually beat *Ghosts 'n Goblins* and recited the Heart Sutra 150 times!), and finally getting my merch sorted out (I'm so sorry it took two years T_T). Looking back at my creator dashboard, I realized just how many games I played and how much I accomplished this year. My subscriber count grew steadily, and I’ve felt so consistently loved. Even though YouTube's silly algorithm still ignores me, and I always stress over whether my streams are entertaining enough, I genuinely feel like I'm letting go of my own rigid expectations. I'm starting to loosen up and stop holding myself back. I'm not sure if it's just because it makes life easier or if I truly don't need to overthink things anymore, but I hope I can keep gaining clarity.

Finally, thank you all for choosing to spend your time with me. I'm grateful for whatever twist of fate brought us together, and I'm proud of myself for continuing to walk this path. I hope we can all achieve the goals we set out for ourselves this year, and keep growing together. Wishing you all a healthy, peaceful, and joyful New Year!

I'll see you all in next year's weekly journal! Bye-bye!

P.S. You can catch the VOD of today's agency collab if you missed it!